Friday, September 11, 2015

My New Favorite Person On The Entire Planet

I feel it is necessary to inform you of my new-found love.

You know how much I love teachers, having been one, having married one, having so many fabulous ones teach my girls, and on and on. Yay, Teachers!

But Ya'll.

I am ashamed to say I never knew the wonder that is School Secretary until today. 

School Secretary = my new favorite people group.

I subbed a few days for the sweet, sweet secretary at my kids' small elementary school, which has about 225 students. 

I want to kiss her feet.

You might think the school secretary does things like answer the phone and send emails. That is true...for 0.00001% of the day.

The rest : nurse/counselor/nurse/NURSE.

I passed out 5,000 band aids over the course of one school day. To 225 students.

I dealt with blood coming from a child's ear.

I taped a kid's jammed finger and then was bombarded with questions from another boy who had heard a rumor that "the lady who is in the office today popped my buddy's finger back into the socket and was it awesome or gross?" Um, I taped it. It was pretty awesome. Wait, no, no it was not.

I handled two episodes of bathroom accidents. You know what I mean.

I tried to determine whether or not a nose was truly broken or the soccer ball to the face caused mostly emotional trauma. (I diagnosed it as emotional trauma. I have no qualifications to assess that situation. I hope her nose doesn't fall off in her sleep.)

I took the temperature of all the children ever and finally, after 37 attempts, figured out how to use the thermometer cover.

Two kids came down with a stomach bug which nearly sent me over the freaking edge. This girl can't even when puking is involved.

I filled up All The Baggies with ice for All The Fake Hurt Children.

A six-year old kid asked me to pull his molar. Get back to class.

There was lots of crying. So much crying.

And I got to hug some babies and listen to some stories and have my heart break a little and love on the least of these and try to hide my laughter until they went back to class. 

And most importantly, a new hero was added to my list of People I Love More Than Whipped Cream... The School Secretary.

You need to make sure you take a Starbucks to the secretary at your kid's school at least once a week. And pray for her and anoint her with oils and extra good Christmas presents. 

And band aids.

Grace for All The School Secretaries in the Entire Universe,

No comments:

Post a Comment

Share your own craziness here. We are all in this together. Let's laugh about it.